Let me share the life I had with papa. I was his darling son . Today I want to share my story about papa and God in the eyes of his dearest son.
5 things I learnt from papa during my journey with him. He is :
1.The man of Honor
During his life, papa always bring us in his prayer, and one of the prayer he always said is this statement : ” … so you will be a son who love God and beloved by God. So you will be a son who is useful for this nation, and so you will be a son who is abide to your parent…”
In his contemplative prayer, He always put the act to love this nation as The act to love God and to serve or abides to parent.
During his life, He also told us about The story of Chinese folks, a spy who love his parent and at the same must fulfil his loyalty to his nation, a dilemma that he can’t decide, to love the nation or to love the parents, at the end he commit suicide because he can’t betray his nation nor let away his parent died.
also A great general, Yue Fei 岳飞. who is given a tattoo in his body by his mom,
“serving the nation with the utmost loyalty’”
To love this nation. That’s why we, I and Soetris, are fighting hard in Dapur Masak, although papa was not understand on what we were doing until the last breath of him. We work hard to bring happiness to our nations, although we should sacrifice our career and degrees. Because of a simple prayer that papa put on us in day to day prayers.
And this statement echoed in my minds, “What God want me to do for this nation in this world”
2. The man of faith
I remember him as “little Jobs” in the Bible.
During 1996-1998 was one of the hardest time in his life. I was there, and saw how devastated him at that time.
He lost one of his son, daughter in law, and grand daugther, During that time, he lost his home, his shelter and all of his wealth, even more he was hurt by most people he considered as friends. He suffered from sickness and pain in his soul during 1997 financial crisis.
But one day he wrote a declaration, “I don’t love the money”. He proclaimed that “I am the servant of God not the world.”
And, as God restored Jobs in the bible, God also restored papa. Soetris, papa always proud of you, He always share your great story in Taruna Nusantara, He always mention you as a standard of son who make me proud.
And I want to give you a testimonial, during that dark days, He Never Cursed God, instead he glorified God through song and prayer. At that time when papa already lost his tear ( he can’t cry anymore because of the depression), he kept glorifying Jesus Christ, our God, our saviour.
And even more, God restored fathers soul, God restored papa family, God gave grand son between his grand children.
I saw that “He fell many times, and many times God hold him, stronger.”
“The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: and he delighteth in his way. Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down: for the Lord upholdeth him with his hand.” – Psalms 37:23-24
3. The man of love
Father also love to argue. One day, he came to argue about some topics, it was a great friday. Because I didn’t want to argue, I tried to change the topics. I told him about great friday. How Christ lost his relation with His Father just to save a sinful people like us. For a moment in eternity, God, our father, was torn from his beloved son, Jesus Christ. And surprisingly He was crying, and he said the words that I can’t forget, “how stupid he who reject the Cross of Christ” – “bodoh-bodoh orang yg menolak Salib Kristus”
I don’t understand why he was crying, and why he said that statement. Until yesterday, God gave me a revelations : Papa was an adopted son, when he knew about being adopted, He was hurt by a father he never had (but God be His father), our grand father have to “sold” papa to his foster family because they can’t support him.
But God, our Father, have to torn his relation with his son, Jesus Christ, not because of inability to support nor hate. God want to save sinful person like him, so we can be adopted by grace of GOD to be God’s son, and Calling our God as our Father!
That is why He is crying, because of the love of God who want adopt papa.
And he really meant it. In his life, to everyone, his family, children, relative, best friends, even a small man, like garbage men, maid. Papa told them about the love of God and How great God is, that saved wretched like him. He bring them to God. Even in the last days of papa in this earth, he keep glorified the Lord by telling to the worker who renovate our house.
All because He love God and God love him even more
4. The man of sorrow
He always told us about How the world hurt him many times, father he never had, being deceived by his friends, and many more.
And as a person, I know in his life, he might hurt you by his words or his acted. It’s a simple as “if you hurt me, I will hurt you back”
But we also saw How God change his hurt heart. We saw how fathers struggling everyday to forgive everyone but in the near final of his life he proclaimed that he forgave and forget.
He forgave and forget, and he is forgiven (God forgive him)
Even the last verses that he read in his bible is about this verses…
For the director of music. A psalm of David. When the prophet Nathan came to him after David had committed adultery with Bathsheba.
1 Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your unfailing love;
according to your great compassion
blot out my transgressions.
2 Wash away all my iniquity
and cleanse me from my sin.
3 For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is always before me.
4 Against you, you only, have I sinned
and done what is evil in your sight;
so you are right in your verdict
and justified when you judge.
5 Surely I was sinful at birth,
sinful from the time my mother conceived me.
6 Yet you desired faithfulness even in the womb;
you taught me wisdom in that secret place.
7 Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean;
wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
8 Let me hear joy and gladness;
let the bones you have crushed rejoice.
9 Hide your face from my sins
and blot out all my iniquity.
10 Create in me a pure heart, O God,
and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
11 Do not cast me from your presence
or take your Holy Spirit from me.
12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation
and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.
13 Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
so that sinners will turn back to you.
14 Deliver me from the guilt of bloodshed, O God,
you who are God my Savior,
and my tongue will sing of your righteousness.
15 Open my lips, Lord,
and my mouth will declare your praise.
16 You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it;
you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.
17 My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart
you, God, will not despise.
18 May it please you to prosper Zion,
to build up the walls of Jerusalem.
19 Then you will delight in the sacrifices of the righteous,
in burnt offerings offered whole;
then bulls will be offered on your altar.
5. The man of Joy
Papa is a great prayer. He really had a quality time with God, in the way we never can understand why he always put God’s relation as his first priority. He even had his own rule when he was praying:
“Quiet, strict schedule, and punishment!”
He will punish us, if we broke the rules. We thought he’s too hard and too stricted on everything about praying.
But now I can see it on different perspective.
if you ever fall in loves. and you missed her badly. You will be very happy if you can call her. And if by then someone cut off your call. I am sure you will enraged to that person. That’s what happen to papa. For him praying is the act of love to contact his darlings, God.
It will be happened when You are so in love with the person in other side of the call and so He was with GOD, and God to him even more.
1 As the deer pants for streams of water,
so my soul pants for you, my God.
2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
When can I go and meet with God?
Everyday he read psalms. A lovely conversation between David and God. Papa read it as if he read a love letter. Papa put his name on David name in every conversation of God to him in psalms. for example :
1 As the deer pants for streams of water,
so Satya’s soul pants for you, my God.
2 Satya’s soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
When can Satya go and meet with God?
On every promise that he read, papa found hope. Papa really fall in love with God’s.
And I can imagine now, that after 54 years reading God love letter to him in psalms (he start read since 18 years old). Now at last, papa met God, his dearest one. And from now on he will always be with God, I am not worry to proclaim that he now live in peace and joy.
Because There is no other joys than staying with God
“Better is one day in your courts
than a thousand elsewhere;
I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of the wicked.”
He is the man of Joy, and his real joy is to enjoy God forever in His endless love
Today, I do not want to share about How Great he was, but I want to share my testimonial about How Grateful he was, when God is in his life. He is man of God.
Now is your option, he had fought a good fight. He had choose in whom he believe in. He had finished his race. And he want us, every born son and daughter of him to finish our race in the way he finished his race and should be better.
“Son should be greater than his dad, you should pass the milestones that I had reached.” – Satya Widjaya
Now I already shared this story to you, so in the moment when we see his body in the coffin, I hope you can see his soul : the life of dearest God’s son, a warm hearted husband and a lovely dad.
Thank you papa.
our beloved husband, father and grandfather
Jakarta, 18 March 1942 – 13 July 2014
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